Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Views from my kayak

I haven't posted enough here since Blogger changed the format and every time I do show up here, it feels a bit frantic as I click around finding my sweet spot.

I have been having some sweet experiences like outdoor art for everyone


finding polar bears during an extended, parching heat wave

and out houses right off the secondary highway

not to mention thinking I was candidly photographing a heavily tattooed man only to get home and find I wasn't so candid with my camera.

Life has been hard and strange and exhilarating and I still don't know which direction I am headed any given day. The best I do is show up and sometimes muck along, sometimes grab the brass ring. Just when I thought I had tempered the change blasting through, I feel yet another wave of light and shadow shaking me up and making sure I am exactly where I need to be.


Thursday, July 5, 2012

Where I've Been

Here and there.  Not here-here.  But here in my life.

I have been leaving some of the Rock Fairy's messages behind

wishing Anne Lamott would write another book about her spiritual journey because I could use her insights and humour right now.

 So much change, some welcome and some not so welcome.  I am trying to go with the flow, open my heart and let it all in and out,

astonished at how often I stop and wonder, "how can I still be finding my way?"

To paraphrase the Wild  Jane Cunningham, I have been trading in nice for real.

 I have not been using my camera much, feeling worn and tattered with looking at myself through a lens.

Discovering that nothing good ever comes when someone starts a sentence with, "Do me a favour...".

I have been disappointed in the way Keen handled my complaint after a pair of their sandals fell apart after a few short weeks of light wear.  I'm back to my old trusty Nike flip flops, still spongy after all these years.

I have also been living without a watch for about a month now, observing how, although I am still bound by schedule and time, I am letting the minutes and hours pass by themselves, as they will.  It is not a little disorienting.

I have been meeting my shadow face to face and battling it instead of embracing it and holding it close to let it cry itself out.  I have been remembering why I left old habits behind, feeling my crustiness tumble over the colour of my soul

and gratitude in the magic that has appeared.