Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Perfect. NOT!

Even though he looks angelic and I can talk a blue streak about my boy, he is not perfect. And yesterday, his birthday, was a prime example. First off, he was quite ticked off at me when I only exposed three or four presents before school. Yeah, I let him open them too. Then after school (his) and work (mine) I piled up the other presents I had stored away. He looked a little disappointed, then after opening them all he was really disappointed. Is that all there is? That summed up his attitude and his words. I am going to be brief and say I didn't necessarily handle it like Donna Reed or Florence Henderson. So I slept fitfully, felt awful all day today while he was at school and I was at work. It was worse because it was shades of my own childhood, those things that both scarred me and contributed to who I am today. But not what I wanted my own child to experience as part of his childhood. Tonight I got the chance to talk to him about it. I apologized for acting like an ass and he apologized for acting like one too. And when it was time for bedtime stories, I chose the children's version of "Feed The Good Wolf". I admitted that yesterday I had been feeding my bad wolf and I was sorry for making him feel rotten on his birthday. He admitted he had done the same. And we kissed and made up. Neither of us is perfect but I am glad we can have an honest dialogue about our feelings. That is something I didn't have growing up. And I know I am doing some things differently, hopefully some things right too.

Eating some Nerds tonight, after bath and with yesterday's "crown". God, I love him.

P.S. I was holding out on one big present, waiting for his father to arrive back in town and have a proper celebration with cake. And maybe that was why I over-reacted, part of me was ticked off that he really knew there was more.


Brenda said...

You are human, probably most mums would react the same way initially - the important thing is how you two made up - I take my hat off to you - you are a great mum!!!

Beth said...

Looking back, I have plenty of regrets as to my behaviour as a mother but not offering an apology for that (at times) lousy behaviour is not one of them. (And I'm still capable of such behaviour.) My kids learned to do the same.
Love, honesty and forgiveness - a great combination between mother and child.